Tips for Avoiding Conflicts Before DNA Results Come Out

Angela Miller of in conversation with Mac and Natalia of discussing a trending topic of what to do when you receive a genetic test revealing that you are related to someone you were previously unaware of and how to avoid conflict when this happens.

Based on her experience both in private and professional life, Angela explains how such a discovery might create internal conflict in yourself and with other family members. Before making any attempts to contact the prospective family member you should definitely be aware of the fact that it might bring certain risks on you – like the necessity to evaluate your own judgements or the risk of being rejected or causing erosion to current relationship.

Therefore instead of being overexcited about the new findings, it is best to allow yourself some time and try to apply certain rules of the etiquette when contacting the new individuals, like keeping things short, using a simple language, making 2-3 attempts the most. On top you might need to be prepared that it might take a lot of time for the connection to happen and that such a connection might not ever occur.

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Just keep it simple. Don’t ask a lot of questions. Don’t bombard them that way to push them off, limit your attempts to two, if really eager then three, and give time in between each one. And don’t push the issue. You know, hey, I’ve emailed you and I haven’t heard back from you. It’s their decision, their choice whether or not they want to correspond back. And so keep that ownership in their area. Don’t take it from them.

Lawyer, mediator, arbitrator, practicing family law but passionate about helping people resolve their conflicts and disputes through mediation.